Forest's First Fall - Humpty Dumpty Had a Great Fall

Thursday, 3/20/2014

Forest’ First Fall

            Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,

         Humpty Dumpty had a great fall;

         All the king's horses and all the king's men

         Couldn't put Humpty together again.

            6:25 a.m. Baby Forest fell off the rocker chair – unbuckled and bumped his head.

            The rhymes are from Celeste and Eric ‘s old Mother Goose book I brought along in January.  Grandma has always been reading to him after feeding to keep him calm and quiet.  

            It has been a perfectly controlled morning routines ever since I took the job as Forest’s “Super Nanny” in January.  I followed their instructions instead of using my own as “Super Nanny” per se.  He is a remarkable good sleeper through the night from 7:00 p.m.  everyday.   I joked to my daughter, “He is all programmed with a set of scientific codes.”  His peeping would start around 5:30 a.m.  I could hear him scratching the sheet and soft landing roll back to sleep.  Then, sweet babbling or humming sounds like those of a baby bird; cheep, cheep, buzz, buzz, mum, mum …. would go on and off pending on his mood.   This morning his peeping changed to high-pitched loud crying message, “Hey, you all, I want to get up!”

            So, it happened when Hans was readying himself in the shower for early meeting in Santa Barbara, and mom was making 4 bottles of milk of the day.  Instead of asking me for extra hand, she could have done.  She knew I was up 4:00 a.m. in the morning usually.  Instead, Celeste moved him from the crib to the kitchen settling him on the rocker chair unbuckled.  That was one of the grandma old-fashioned rules – never left the child unattended or unbuckled I had mentioned to them when I took the job.  Yes, she heard it, but actually doing it is another. 

            When I heard ‘Bam’ the hard-hit on the floor, I rushed to his nursery room. Not here! Then, I checked in the kitchen, Mom, feeling so distressed, already held him rocking in her arm.  The baby was crying hysterically, and huffing and puffing incessantly.  Poor thing, it must be terrifying to him for the first fall.  I remained silent and quickly put the blue ice wrapped with clothes trying to ice the little bump on his forehead.   With him squirming around, I had only little success.  By then, Hans already came out of the bathroom and assessed the condition.  Luckily, it was only a little red and swollen – no big deal!  I am sure both of them felt awful for what had happened.  It’s their first child as new parents.  Celeste was distraught especially.  Upset is an understatement.  I assured them that I would keep an eye on him all day and would try any tricks to ice his forehead.    

            Hans instructed me to double check his behavior before he left.  Celeste and I again quietly sat on the couch – no comments for anything.  When Forest started getting back to his normal hi-energy bouncy movement on his mom’s lap, I know he was going to be ok.

            To break the awkward silence, I started to recite the nursery to myself instead, or maybe to Forest particularly.

         Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,

         Humpty Dumpty had a great fall;

         All the king's horses and all the king's men

         And Grandma will put you back together again.

            It’s that moment that I shared with my daughter my parenting experience again, which she has been quite open with me about hers.  That’s good.  But I started,  “My morning-madness routine like the one I could remember for your brother, Eric– picking him up from the crib with blanket wrapped around, rushing for his readiness to the baby sitter’s house.  Sometimes, he was fed and sometimes he was not, because I had to get you ready for morning day-care program as well.  With your daddy being out of town all the time, I wished for an extra helper.  But, I made it without, or maybe, I didn’t have the luxury to do so.  I ended it up being guilty for my life as the worst mom in the world.  Eric’s many accidents – from 8 months to 1 year old, two trips to The Shady Grove Hospital emergency room for a few stitches from bumping to Daddy’s desk and hitting the fireplace bricks from crawling.   The worst was his swallowing 1 dime and 1 nickel when you were counting your lunch money and he got his hands before I could stop him.  He was 1 ½ years old then.  So, do not feel bad.  There will have several bumps, cuts and scratches, as he gets older.  Your brother is the example.”  Then, she started crying, perhaps from postpartum blues still?  “I know I heard you when you told me, but, I just do not want to be lectured.”  I started to have watery eyes also.

            As the blue ice in the wrapped clothes started to melt, I felt like the strained relationship between mother and daughter begins to loosen as well.  It’s just a comforting closeness of tight-knit relationship.  I will never use my authoritative style of parenting to my grandchild, because he is not my child.  I do not think my daughter needs my affirmation of the love I used to feel for her anymore.  She said, “Mom, I am a grownup now!”

            We all believe in that we both are not merely competitive and quite independent in nature, we also differ as to how best to offer our parenting to raise the child.  Now, we are expected to put aside our differences and support a common goal – easy! 

            Ugh, It will never be a perfect world.  We will mend the bruises either for Forest or for us; it’s just a part of growing pains of our lives.